It is alleged that the overweight and sadly dishevelled car salesman has been sighted making inappropriate approaches to individual member of the Society in person, by post and by various electronic means.
Indeed the illustrious acting chairman and honorary president "Driver Chard of El Hadje Duiff" has reported being approached by an overweight clandestine figure, closely resembling the current countenance of the "Fat Wallet", offering financial inducements to introduce members of the society to his obnoxious and illegal
pyramid scheme.
Driver Chard, being of good character and in no need of a financial kick back due to his existing fortune, dubiously earned as an employee of the publishing empire of the now deceased Robert Maxwell, turned him down flat . However this did not prevent "Fat Wallet" approaching other members of the Financial and Imbibing committee, including Dave the Teach, former Military hard man Basher Hurley, Dave Duck and Bazza. Once again these committee members turned aside the illegal scam offered by the former migraine riddled playboy, with the exception of Bazza Duck, who is believed to accepted an offer to invest in the fund.
As a long time regular of the Duck, Bazza hopes to be able to exploit his knowledge of the regular imbibers, and indeed "Mad Malcolm", an alcoholic ex ambulance operative, has already been targeted by our Grey haired friend. .
The scheme offered up by "Fat Wallet" is a straightforward Pozni style scheme, with promises of trebling your original investment within six months of stumping up your collateral. However, it is understood that the funds handed over to the fat wallet of the aging former playboy will be immediately invested in American sports cars and Camper Van parts for his own vicarious amusement, with the funds solicited from future scammed members being re cycled to fool the earlier investors in to believing that the twisted scheme they had invested in is legitimately producing an income.
The Financial sub Committee of the Duck Flat Cap Society are to meet on the summer solstice to decide whether to involve the authorities in obtaining retribution for this sly attempt at soliciting funds from society members, or if they will meet out sufficient punishment themselves, with the help of the notorious northern barbarians of the Ekee Thump Brigade.
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