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Tuesday 27 August 2013

THE WAR OF CHARD'S EAR

THE WAR OF CHARD'S EAR


Driver Chard of El Hadj Duiff, acting president and chairman of the Duck Flat Cap Society (D.F.C.S), has sensationally declared war on Spain over the present dispute with Gibraltar.

Driver Chard sites provocation going back to the War of Jenkins ear and the subsequent War of the Austrian succession. Driver Chard claiming direct ancestry on his mothers side to Captain Jenkins, whose severed ear gave rise to the name of the war bearing his name.

Driver Chard further claims that on his last trip to the Iberian peninsular an over enthusiastic passport officer at the port of Malaga, tried to severe his ear after an altercation concerning an illegal package of snuff, a whip made from a camels tail, and an old copy of the Spectator ridiculing General Franco.

After protracted discussions, and in his duel role as the acting joint chief of staff, Driver Chard of El Hadj Duiff, has allegedly authorised the departure of a military naval and airborne task force to convey a detachment of D.F.C.S and BLOG volunteers to the Mediterranean outpost of British colonial rule.

The joint task force will again be receiving support from various affiliates, including the “Ecky Thump Brigade” based in north western England. This affiliate continues to be headed by the strong minded ex Teacher. “Dave the Teach”, and will be supporting the joint task force by sending a number of war hardened ex military hard-men, trained by his compatriot sexologist and triple heart bypass survivor, Basher “Rasta man” Hurley.

A recently intercepted dispatch from GCHQ allegedly stipulates that the joint military venture has been sanctioned by the British Government, the UN and NATO. This is yet to have been verified by an official release, although unconfirmed additional intercepted ciphers from the State intelligence services of numerous former Cold War enemy’s of the west, allegedly confirm the legitimacy of the reports. 

At the North London base of the joint command, Driver Chard has additionally assumed the rank's of Admiral and Field Marshall, and has donned the appropriate uniform at recent meetings, which he has adorned with medals from his previous military service in Egypt, Wealdstone and North Africa.

He will off course continue to wear his Fulham FC shirt, shorts and socks and suspenders under his uniform, and place a whistle between his cracked lips in case of an infringement during the committee meeting.

 However, he has denied access to military uniforms for the remainder of the high command as he feels that this will undermine his authority. He will however, allow the wearing of standard issue flat caps and if requested a fully functional Deerstalker will be tolerated.
Pork pie hats together with any form of Russian or eastern European winter gear will not be allowed at any cost, together with any form of sombrero.

This is to be challenged at an eminent meeting of the full Duck Flat Cap and BLOG military invasion and occupation sub committee, which is to be attended by all personnel. In this respect, Basher Hurley has informed the high command that he is to seek special privileges and wear the uniform of the SAS in view of his previous brief spell as a latrine cleaner when sharing accommodation in Naples, Italy.

It is of a more disturbing note that as with the previous expedition to the Falkland Islands, Pepe le Puke and Ray the Dust have informed various cohorts that they are to seek permission to wear the uniform of the Nazi Waffen SS, as they are drawn to the high decorative detail of the epaulets and cuffs, and are divinely in love with the dagger and death head motifs.       

In addition to the D.F.C.S faction within the alliance, The Bohemian League of Gentleman have also been debating how best to support the action from their home base in Metroland.
 Unlike the D.F.C.S, there has been no problem with a uniform for the BLOG defence Corp, as they were unanimous in agreeing to re use the orange and purple fatigues, utility belt and thigh high rubber Doctor Martins used in the earlier campaign to relieve the Falklands.. As before, in addition an 18 inch rubber truncheon is worn down the front of the trousers at all times. 

The groups special representative for political and metaphysical affairs, "Lord Louis Loafington Smythe – Barron", has been in the forefront with regards to home security, and has arranged for a fully mechanised Camel division to be on standby at all times.

 This magnificent effort has been supported by the "Mossenelle" who in his capacity as an ex East German spy has been in the forefront in arranging the deciphering of the encrypted messages detailed earlier in this report.
Indeed together with Boozy Creed, the Italian Stallion, Chairman Get Karter and the Big Marty Blainster, the Mosenelle has formed a deep relationship with the intelligence unit attached to the D.F.C.S, and previous work on the Big Bobbidy Bob affair and the earlier joint D.F.C.S and Bohemian advance to relieve the Falkland Islands, has meant that deciphering the codes has been an easy task.
 
Indeed, it is believed that the listening station based in Benidorm has already been in receipt of deciphered codes intercepted back in Metroland and the Duck.

As previously during the joint action to save the Falkland Islands,the diminutive Sapper Cox has been excused from this task, as he has been acting a batman and personal aide to Winny WWB Brownoski. 

Brownoski has himself been tasked with creating a spectacular and magnificent marching rhythm for the group to accompany a swift advance through occupied Spanish territory if the Special Forces are required to go behind enemy lines.

 As tension rises, a decision on a strike date is required and a full meeting of the joint heads of staff and their full military command  will be held shortly, after which a full report will be posted here.

R.I.P   JOHN CHARD 1933 - 2020






 

Wednesday 21 August 2013

THE ACCIDENTAL TAXIDERMIST

THE ACCIDENTAL TAXIDERMIST


Seth Brown sat at his usual seat in his local pub thinking about the days events.

 Drinking a pint of warm bitter and nibbling on a packet of stale potato crisps, he sighed as he pulled his crumpled note book from his jacket pocket and folded the cover back to reveal a multitude of his wild scribblings.

Only hours earlier, Seth Brown had been standing in the middle of Ma Baker's lower field holding the largest human skull he had ever seen. The white cranium was detached from the rest of the skeleton, and had been uncovered a number of inches below the clinging top soil.


Astonished by his find, he placed his Truffle trowel in to his spacious jacket pocket and knelt on the ground beside the decapitated cranial structure. His pet dog, Pepe, wagged his tale as he pawed at his masters arms, twisting his pink tongue about his snout whilst whimpering for a reward. Seth reached in to his trouser pocket and retrieving a packet of peppermints held his hand out so that Pepe could snaffle up his reward.

The mandible was no longer attached but had laid undisturbed next the the blanched cranium, its muscles and tendons that previously attached the projecting jaw to the rest of the skull long disintegrated. However next to the dismembered bones was a small red wallet that contained little other than a telephone number and an old black and white photograph of a man completing the Western Roll over a high jump hurdle.

Placing the Skull and Mandible in to a plastic bag, Seth returned to his old land-rover and after coaxing Pepe to jump in to the back with another peppermint, drove the short distance to his cottage in the village. After brewing a cup of Yorkshire Tea, Seth placed the white bones on his kitchen table and retrieving the telephone number discovered in the old red wallet, telephoned the number on his old land line- Arnold 3347. 

The phone rang for a number rings and was then answered by a woman exclaiming that the caller had reached the residence of Archibald Galbraith, "Taxidermist to the landed gentry". The caller went on to describe the various services that the Taxidermists offered, and listed a comprehensive list of prices associated with the stuffing and otherwise preserving of  dead creatures, ending with a complex series of  costs for the preservation and presentation by mounting, of a member of the human race.

Seth took his note pad from his jacket pocket and laboriously scribbled down the various price structures dictated by the representative of Archibald Galbraith, "Taxidermist to the landed gentry". The prices were all astronomical and well out of reach of the retired truffle collector, and wiping his brow with an old purple and orange cravat, returned the phone to the receiver, and pushed his glasses up on to his forehead..

Seth then remembered that as well as the telephone number, there was also an old photograph to inspect. Grabbing the soiled wallet he stared at the faded photograph and turned the photo over to inspect its reverse. There, to his surprise, was an inscription in small block capitals that read,



 "To the finder of this photograph and my deceased body -  It has always been my intention for my remains to be preserved and displayed in my local hostelry so that the members of my society may include me in their discussions when debating society business. Please ensure my wishes are enacted or the curse of Little Legs Parks and Mad Albert disease will descend upon you and your decedents. Yours faithfully, Driver Chard of El Hadj Duiff".

Seth, now wondered what he could do as he had little money but did not wish to upset the spirits and enable the wrath of Driver Chard to descend upon his lonely but comfy life.  At that moment he remembered an old chemistry set that was located in his cellar, and that he was in the habit of retaining large quantities of formaldehyde in case he was suddenly called upon to embalm road kill or pets.

  The chemicals, together with a couple of marbles and a large wedge of modelling clay, enabled Seth to quickly embellish the skull and mandible to such an extent that a myopic one eyed drunk may consider the likeness to be that of the high jumper in the old black and white photograph. To finish the job, and old fish tank was conveniently just the correct size to take the reconstructed head within its scratched and opaque plastic walls.

With the wonder of taxidermy complete, Seth drove the short distance to the Duck in the Pond, and after a short discussion with the landlord, placed the reconstructed head of Driver Chard upon the wall of the pub, conveniently adjacent to the Duck Flat Cap Societies debating table.

Seth took another sip from his warm pint of bitter and closed his faded note book thinking "Job Done" and with a smile across his face tilted his face towards the Head of Chard and collapsed stone dead from a heart attack, as the dismembered mock piece of taxidermy winked back at him and flipped over within the confines of his plastic container!


RIP John Chard.























Monday 12 August 2013

THE TREATY OF WESTPHALIA (1648) REPUDIATED BY DRIVER CHARD OF EL HADJ DUIFF

THE TREATY OF WESTPHALIA (1648) REPUDIATED BY DRIVER CHARD OF EL HADJ DUIFF

In an astonishing statement Driver Chard, acting president and chairman of the Duck Flat Cap Society, has repudiated and rejected the "Peace of Westphalia" as described and agreed by the various agreements designated under the title -  "The Treaty of Westphalia".

The Treaty / Peace of Westphalia was a series of peace treaties signed between May and October 1648 in Osnabruck and Munster. These treaties ended the Thirty Years War (1618–1648) in the Holy Roman Empire, The Bohemian War of Turdoxian and Glumpug resistance (1620-1648) in Croxley Green and Greater Moravia, and the Eighty Years War (1568–1648) between Spain and the Dutch Republic, with Spain formally recognising the independence of the Dutch Republic.

Driver Chard wishes the map of Europe to be rearranged so that Germany disintegrates in to a thousand city states, Bishoprics and Duchies, Switzerland returns to the re configured Holy Roman Empire,( to be renamed the Holy Chard Empire after the relevant plebiscite), and The Netherlands, including Belgium, returned to Spanish sovereignty.

Driver Chard's reasoning being that it would be much easier to travel to Spain for a sun drenched holiday if you only had to travel across the channel to Amsterdam or Brussels, and that a combined Switzerland and Austria would offer far greater savings on lift passes in ski resorts during a winter break.

He also claims to be a direct descendant of Charlemagne,via his Lotharingian lineage,and a distant relative of the Hapsburg's, thus his claim to the throne of the Holy Roman / Chard Empire.    

 Driver Chard of El Hadj Duiff is to demand that the United Nations pass a resolution ratifying his dream, and as such, the septuagenarian silver fox is to travel to the United Nations building in New York this weekend, and will attend a specially convened emergency meeting of the Security Council, having gained admittance as a delegate of the esteemed Duck Flat Cap Society.

Further details will be published in due course.

R.I.P   JOHN CHARD 1933 - 2020






   

Tuesday 6 August 2013

FRACKING HELL! - DRIVER CHARD IN D.F.C.S. OIL AND GAS BID

FRACKING HELL! - DRIVER CHARD IN D.F.C.S. OIL AND GAS BID


In an audacious act of cunning and subterfuge, Driver Chard of El Hadj Duif has obtained a license for hydraulic fracturing beneath the Duck in the Pond.

The license has been granted in the name of The Duck Flat Cap Society and permits drilling for a six month test period, with an option to extend the licenses remit for a further ten year period on expiry. 

Driver Chard of El Hadj Duif, acting president and chairman of the D.F.C.S., claims that as a callow fourteen year old youth he was involved with the first experimental use of hydraulic fracturing in 1947, and the first commercially successful application in 1949.
Driver Chard of El Hadj Duiff

His link with the original operation being his ability to effect the perfect "Western Roll", thus enabling him to twist, turn,vault and weave around,the various pipes and hoses that were pumping fluid in to the ground under immense pressure. If a seal was to blow or a coupling fail, Driver Chard was able to leap majestically away from any steaming fluid or gas released from the breakage.

 
Western Roll
At a full meeting of the "Hydraulic fracking,Western Roll and imbibing" subcommittee, Driver Chard was questioned by northern agitator, "Dave the Teach" as to where the funds were obtained to purchase the license.  Driver Chard replied exclaiming that no funds had yet changed hand, but that he had obtained finance from a "Pay Day" loan company  named "wesqueezeyourballstotheyburst.com", at a reasonable rate of 2,500,00% APR.

 After a swift glance around the table the members of the sub committee quickly nodded their acceptance to this deal, after being formally seconded by "Barry the Green Keeper", who previously worked for the loan  company knocking on doors,collecting regular repayments and bad  debts, often assisted by a baseball bat.

Driver Chard then became extremely agitated when asked by Ray the Dust if a geological survey had been conducted so as to confirm whether reserves of oil and gas were located in the bedrock beneath the Duck in the Pond. The Dust continued to retort that an earlier survey conducted on behalf of the "coal, shale and Lapis Lazuli" subcommittee, headed by Pepe le Puke, indicated that no shale or coal deposits were located withing fifty miles of the proposes drill site.
Ray the Dust and Basher Hurley



 
As Ray the Dust finished his statement Driver Chard leaped from his seat, and advanced toward the overweight failed karaoke singer and part time dust cart operative. Struggling for breath, the slow thinking Ray the Dust struggled to move from his seated position and desperately supped from his pint of Becks.

 Glancing across the table to "Basher Hurley", sexologist and former military adviser to the society, he noted that due to ill health the "black ops" operative was not going to be of assistance in averting the thrusting attack of Driver Chard. 

Placing both hands around the Dusts neck the acting chairman and president turned a dark purple colour as he attempted to throttle his portly compatriot.
Struggling to get both hands around the size 30 neck of the aging and bloated Dust, his grip slipped and his hands fell to his side.

Seething with rage he grabbed his furled umbrella from the table and stamped the pointed end down on to the gout infested toe of Ray the Dust.
Pepe le Puke and Ray the Dust



The Dust, assisted by his diminutive and mentally retarded fellow dust cart operative Pepe le Puke, retaliated by grabbing Driver Chard's black and white braces and releasing them with a thud as they twanged back on to the heaving chest of the gasping Driver Chard.

With this the septuagenarian chairman fell to his knees,simultaneously pulling his checked shirt from his torso revealing a shameful replica Fulham F.C shirt, and throwing his head back attempted ritual Harri Kari using his umbrella as a replacement for a ceremonial sword. 


Meerkat Mal


With this action, "Meerkat Mal" threw himself at the makeshift blade, managing to deflect the trajectory sufficiently for the rusted point to pierce the faded replica football shirt but miss the flesh of Driver Chard.
Meerkat Mal completed his maneuver by grabbing the old timer by his arms and pulling him from his kneeling position and placing him on to the adjacent seat.

After all the commotion, Driver Chard was supplied with three pints of John Smiths Bitter and a large whiskey by the landlord, and asked to retake his seat at the subcommittee table. When all and sundry were back at the table a further vote was taken as to the societies confidence in Driver Chard continuing his joint role as acting chairman and president.

The emotive  motion was put forward by "Dave the Duck" and seconded by committee newcomer " Big Lol" who was unsure of driver Chard's intentions and feeling towards him. 


Big Lol


The vote was a resounding defeat for "Big Lol" and "Dave the Duck", with a 12 - 2 split in favour of the septuagenarian Driver Chard, with two voters abstaining, believed to be Ray the Dust and Pepe le Puke.

Test drilling is to commence shortly as soon as the first installment of the advance from wesqueezeyourballstotheyburst.com is made available and sufficient surety is pledged as security for the advance.


Further details will posted in due course.  

R.I.P   JOHN CHARD 1933 - 2020



















Monday 5 August 2013

MCKENNA, THE TENNER MAN. (UPDATE 5/2/2018)

     
MCKENNA, THE TENNER MAN.
(UPDATE 5/2/2018)
                                                                   


It had suddenly happened, what was it?

 Later that day a strange but somehow familiar smell began to waft through the building. At first it was hardly noticeable, but soon it was hard not to sense the musty odour slowly spreading through the old building.

October had started unseasonably warm with temperatures in the high seventies. However, with recent news reports explaining the phenomenon of global warming, and the pleasant feeling of the sun on your back, nobody was complaining.
 However the high temperatures could not be blamed on the unpleasant smell, as past " Indian summers " had not resulted in strange smells percolating through the antediluvian wooden warehouse.
  
The old warehouse had seen better days, especially early in the nineteenth century when logging   was still a major local industry.
The original colonial style building that used to be attached to the warehouse was long gone.  However, the numerous original wooden outbuildings were still in existence, and had been converted to holiday homes. They had subsequently become popular with city residents, who appreciated the cool calm air, which drifted of the lakeside during the incessant heat of high summer.

 It had been the recent heat wave that had attracted visitors to the small hamlet, boosting the population to an unseasonable high of approximately one hundred and fifty souls, from the usual   total of thirty eight permanent residents.

 McKenna, the warehouse caretaker, was tired. It was the end of a long hard day, made more tiresome by the influx of outsiders who traipsed through the building all day, pretending to admire the local architecture and enjoy the local history.
 Out of the corner of McKenna's eye something moved, a sensation of motion that can’t be rationally explained although you instinctively know there was movement.
The caretaker strained his bespectacled eyes searching for the confirmation that his eyes were not playing him tricks, and that it was not yet time to buy an expensive new pair of spectacles, and worse still, visit the opticians where his " I told you so!" daughter worked, having completed   four expensive years at university!

 Nothing moved and the air was still. He turned the key and slowly descended the three wooden steps leading away from the now pitch black edifice behind him, but, what was that smell!!

McKenna moved slowly through the black still of the night, limping and dragging his left foot behind him. The limp was due to a hunting accident when he was a young man, and although in earlier years his disability was hardly noticeable, at the age of sixty-five it now meant a slow and difficult shuffle home. 


The clinging atmosphere began to close in on the stumbling old man as he fumbled towards his cabin.
 A light flickered in the distance, and beginning to tire he strained his eyes in the direction of the light source.

 Staring in to the black abyss McKenna stumbled to a halt.

 A light flashed to the left of the track, or did it!

 He was confused as there was no electric or gas artificial lighting in the immediate direction the light had flashed from, and he had not heard the familiar mechanical rumble of a car or motorcycle.
 His thoughts quickly returned to food, as he was famished after missing lunch. 
    
The rain began to fall as it often did at this time of year, but the old caretaker didn’t notice at first as he continued to fantasise over the chicken broth waiting on the kitchen stove. Food had become very important in his old age as most other pleasures now passed him by.  As the rain fell harder he noticed that his feet were beginning
to get wet as the moisture passed through the paper inserts blocking the holes in his shoes.

Rivulets of water began to run down the ineffective spectacles and dripped on to his Knurled top lip.  His tongue flicked upward so as to collect the sour liquid, then returned to his salivating mouth to search out the gaps between his rotten teeth and blistered gums. Blood started to ooze from the thin skin surrounding the base of the teeth and mixed with the warm rainwater to form a familiar mouthwash. False teeth were a luxury that he could not afford, and he had suffered with dental problems from an early age due to ill-fitting homemade wooden teeth.

McKenna’s feet were now wet through, the paper inserts now disintegrating and working there way between the blistered and bloodied toes.   New shoes were a luxury, but chicken broth was not, and McKenna was almost home. His pace quickened but a sharp pain brought him to a sudden halt. This was a different pain, a pain that he had never experienced before. A sharp, high-pitched noise echoed through his head, reverberating from front to back and side to side. He shook his head and shut his eyes. Bright light appeared to flash across his path and the noise in his head got louder. The old man opened his eyes and noticed that there was movement ahead.  McKenna shut his eyes again and passed out.

Slowly he began to waken, his hands and feet twitching as the blood began to flow to the ragged and swollen digits.  His eyes opened and shut tight in one movement. The bright light was penetrating and threatening to blind him by burning the Retinas at the back of his puffy bloodshot eyes. Tears filled the sorry eyes and trickled down rough blotchy cheeks.  He again tried to prise open the limp folds of skin covering his eyes, and he thought he could see his childhood home.  A small cottage with whitewashed walls and thatched roof. Smoke whisping from the chimney pot and apple trees in the garden. He could hear the sound of lambs gambling in the adjacent field, and the stark cry of crows in the sky and trees surrounding the desolate cottage.  

McKenna’s mouth twitched and sputum dribbled from his torn and dry lips.

The cottage was deep in the country, many miles from the nearest settlement of any size. There was however a small tenement a mile away, hidden from view by the forest and ridge of Hills known as the “ Devils Backbone.  As a child McKenna would often walk through the thick clinging forest and wind his way up the ancient track way towards the summit.  Although not high, the ridge offered a commanding view of the surrounding countryside.  The small river winding its way along the escarpment and disappearing in to the impenetrable forest beyond.  The forest contained a large selection of wild animals, of which the most feared was the Timber Wolf.
Black Bears also wondered the wooded acres, and Mountain Lions or Cougars were frequent visitors from the higher Mountains beyond. However, it was the Timber Wolf that had buried its self in the consciousness of the human inhabitants ever since man first set foot in the primeval forest. 


McKenna again opened his eyes and the vision of his childhood home vanished as a sharp jolt brought him to his senses.

 “ What your game then? “  .

The caretaker strained to recognise the nasal tone of the high-pitched voice filling his Waxy partially blocked eardrums.

  “ When will you learn, you stupid old git! “.

McKenna strained and opened his eyes fully, turning his emaciated neck towards the source of the loud uncouth speech ringing in his ears.  At first he was at a loss as to who the tall thin figure was. Slowly he began to recognise the features of Bill Fletcher, and more to the point, the sickly   smell of his foul   fermenting breath. Bill had been a friend of McKenna’s for as long as he could remember, possibly 45 years!

 Bill was now the supervisor at the modern Holiday complex built on the site of the old Warehouse outbuildings. But 45 years ago he was just an unemployed bum, like McKenna, looking for work in the local Logging yards.
 
Bill had grown up in Kent in England, spent a few years in South Africa, and came across to the USA with his parents at the age of 15. Not long after arriving in the USA, both his parents were killed in unexplained circumstances.
 He was staying with a neighbour whilst his parents hitch hiked in to the hill country looking to enjoy a couple of days away from his constant bad behaviour.  After 3 days, and their non-return, Bills neighbour began to worry about their whereabouts, and alerted the local police.   Five days a local farmer found later there corpses beside a road. They had both been strangled, and the skin removed from there necks. Furthermore, their kidneys had been ripped from their torsos and inserted in split stomach of a young Wolf found next to their prone bodies. 


“Bill “ whispered McKenna, what are you doing here!. 

“ I found you outside, face down in the mud “ exclaimed Bill. “ I thought you were dead, and for real this time “. 

“ Where am I “ he groaned, “ home “ came the gruff response.

Bill had found McKenna in the roadway outside his house, and dragged him in to the relative comfort of his home. 

McKenna rolled his ahead across his shoulders and looked towards the stove in the corner of the room. The chicken broth was still there, and Bill had had the foresight to light the stove. The broth bubbled and soon McKenna was spooning the steaming liquid in to his blistered mouth and down his thin stringy neck. Bread from the pantry soon found its way to his mouth, and although covered in thick green blue mould, was devoured as if nectar. Bill thought the penicillin in the mould could only improve the frail caretaker’s precarious state of health.

 McKenna’s digestive system did not take long to respond to the sticky fluid and mouldy bread entering his stomach.  A build up of methane gas soon began its slow but steady exit from his sickly body. If McKenna’s underwear had been unexpectedly clean, it was now stained with a pungent residue.  The air was now thick with the revolting exhaust bellowing from his anal orifice.

Bill ran to the nearest window and fumbled with the fastening.

It was stuck.

A swift blow from the heel of his hand soon freed the latch, and the sweet smell of fresh air pervaded the otherwise stale atmosphere in the dank dingy room.


The old mans mind turned to his childhood in Kent, and in particular the many times he explored the dark caves hidden amongst the chalk hills near his home.

 A smell often reminds someone of a particular time and place, and he thought the stench in the room reminded him of the old corpse he once uncovered whilst playing with friends in an old flint quarry.  An old tramp had drunk one to many and passed away in his sleep. He remained undiscovered for many months prior to his rotting flesh being uncovered by the excited schoolboys.

 Bill then realised that the smell in his thin nostrils was not the product of McKenna’s colon, but a smell from somewhere beyond the now open window and enticed him to leave the warmth of the Cabin to investigate.

Suddenly, and with a loud crash, the old  window suddenly slammed shut and juddered in the flaking frame . Bill recoiled and stumbled backwoods, falling in to table where McKenna continued to fill his now bloated gut.

“ What the hell was that! “ shouted Bill.

 A cold blast of air rushed past him and the crackling fire flickered as the glowing flames devoured the icy torrent. 

“I don’t know  “ was the whispered response, “ but it often happens these days,  Sit down and have a drink “.  Bill opened his mouth to respond when something moved in the corner of his eye. His neck swivelled 45 degrees, stretching the skin round his swollen red neck.

Nothing.

But Bill knew there had been something, and he also knew that the screeching sound ringing in his ears was not   a product of his imagination. The eerie sound had now passed, and the pain in his leg, due to fallen backwards in to the table, began to burn in to his consciousness. It was no more than a twist, but enough to hinder his walk back to his flat at the old Quayside.  No more than a bed-sit, it was sufficient for the supervisor’s simple needs.

 Attached to the Holiday complex, the bed-sit was one of the more modern buildings in the town, and Bill realised that his old body was now in need of the modern comfort its interior offered him. He also knew that the windows were double glazed and lockable. No smell or noise would bother his sleep that night.

Bidding good night, he moved towards McKenna’s front door and turned the latch, but it was stuck. Stooping to clutch his strained leg, he soon had both hands on the latch and with a strong tug the door was open. Looking back over his shoulder, it was clear that his companion was drifting back in to oblivion, and he shut the door behind him. 

Although the damaged leg hindered him, Bill was soon at the lakeside and walking along the old waterfront towards his front door. The lake was dark and menacing and a shiver passed down his back as he glanced across the water towards the small island known as   “Indian Eyelet “.  There was nothing on the island now, but in the past a clearing to the south of the island had been a sacred place for the indigenous natives.
Strange thoughts began to filter through Bills tired mind as he stared out across the black sheet of water. The island was just visible and something seemed to move on the rocky shore.

 Suddenly his attention switched to the loud laughter coming from the bar on the other side of the road. It was Friday night and  “The Woodcutter “ had a full house. It was only 9.30 p.m. but with little else to amuse the locals after sundown, the bar was a favourite haunt fore locals and visitors alike. There were other bars, including one on the Highway just out of town, but  “ The Woodcutter “attracted the best crowd on a Friday night.

Bills thoughts turned to Drink and crossed the road and entered the Bar. He ordered a double whiskey on the rocks and stood at the crowded bar. His leg began to twitch, and he indicated to a younger man sitting on a bar stool that he needed to sit his tired body down. The youth ignored him and indicated to his friends that the old man was invading their space. Not wanting trouble, Bill moved across the Bar and settled against the mantelpiece above the cavernous fireplace.  He flicked his eyes towards the heaving counter and noticed that the boisterous young men had already forgotten him as they swigged their bottles of beer. His eyes also noted that a number of the older men were seated around a large table playing cards. His thoughts again changed as he remembered the many times he had played poker with McKenna, especially during the 50’s when both men were much younger. He decided that tomorrow he would suggest to McKenna a hand or two prior to there usual drink in the waterside bar.

The next day dawned with a heavy mist draped across the lake and a light drizzle filled the air, which was considerably cooler than the previous day. Bill looked out his window and rubbed the sleep from his weeping eyes.  He turned his knurled head back towards the bed and the sweat stained bedding that lay on the floor next to the bed the result of another restless night.

His thoughts turned to McKenna as he bent over and placed the yellowing sheets back on his bed. Bill shuffled towards the kitchen and placed the kettle on the stove. A dirty mug with “Fletch” stamped on the side was pulled from a cupboard and a heap of sticky sugar slid in to the mug. Instant coffee and boiling water soon completed the procedure and the sickly sweet brown liquid was soon flowing passed Bills adams apple.  A packet of half smoked cigarettes was grabbed from another draw and soon Bill was drawing on the dry tobacco and coughing up sticky green phlegm, which was soon ejected in to the overflowing sink.

When the coffee was drunk and the tobacco infused, Bill motioned towards the bathroom and splashed his bony face with cold water. A pair of stained long johns were pulled from a string hung above the shower and Bill struggled in to them balancing one foot on the rim of the toilet basin. A checked shirt, corduroy jeans, long socks and dirty scuffed steel capped boots completed Bills wardrobe.

Meanwhile, McKenna had woken from his slumber and had completed his morning programme in a similar manner to Bill. The only difference being a twenty minute visit to the W.C so as to discharge the usual foul smelling offal from his bowels.

McKenna opened his front door and gazed up the road towards Bills apartment. As his eyes squinted through the drizzle he noted that the lake seemed to be gently bubbling pockets of air up to the surface, creating a broken pattern that was interspersed with the needle like indentations caused by the falling rain. 


As he took the first couple of steps out of his door a shrill ringing from the telephone caused McKenna to pause and look back to his door. The phone rang again sending the old man forward in a spurt that almost sent him sprawling across the doorstep. A further short ring and the phone was in his trembling hand.

“Hello!“ blurted from the handset followed by “ is that you dad! “.

McKenna’s daughter, Meg, had promised to visit him the last time they spoke, and she was now excitingly telling her dad that she would be in town the coming weekend, and that she would have her new fiancé in tow. The old fellow acknowledged Megs high pitched renderings and slowly placed the receiver back to its resting place. He glanced towards the clock on the mantelpiece and took a sharp intake of breath noticing that it was time he should be at Bills.  

McKenna began a slow trudge through the light drizzle towards the misty waters of the lake. The lake seemed to acknowledge his presence by sending a spate of concentric ripples across the cobalt blue surface.

Far below the surface the Pike, Bass and other larger fish began to dash through the weeded channels running along the stone and gravel scattered base of the lake.  Above them the smaller, faster fish began to shoal in increasing numbers, wheeling and diving through the murky depths.  As if the recipients of some hidden message, the fish of the lake were starting to agitate in unison in a rhythmic frenzy. The fish seemingly moving to the beat of the hollow low pitch rumble emanating from below the base of the lake.

In the deepest clefts of the lake the stones and sand began to shift in an eccentric pattern, leaving a crazy paving effect across the marbled gravels.   A spurt of gas erupted from the largest fissure and this in turn forced a stream of foaming water towards the surface of the lake. The flume of water ejected across the surface and launched its self over the Quayside soaking McKenna and the surrounding area.  

McKenna stumbled to a halt, his splattered body turning with his heavy head towards the now foaming waters. His mind flashed back to his first year in the town, when he had last witnessed such a phenomenon. At that time a sailing boat had been caught in the maelstrom and capsized with the loss of all but one on board.

 The sole survivor had spoken of strange happenings as he struggled to stay afloat in the angry waters. He believed that his legs were being pulled at from below the surface as he kicked to keep afloat, and that his mind was full of strange thoughts and images that he could not understand. 

McKenna’s mind quickly switched back to the present and he focused his red itchy eyes on the path ahead of him. He cleared his throat and spat the thick phlegm to the side of the track.  Bill looked at his watch and cursed McKenna for being late again.     

Twenty minutes later the old timers were cursing each other as they ambled together towards the row of wooden shacks adjacent to the lake. They stored their fishing tackle in one of the sheds and they had agreed to spend a few hours spinning for pike prior to lunch in the town’s only diner.  


Their tackle was old fashioned and damaged, but the enthusiasm shown by the old boys made up for the deficiencies of their hard ware. After collecting the tackle, they made the short way over to a slipway where an old wooden boat awaited them. Like the tackle, the boat had seen better days and had been patched up many times. They boarded the vessel with great difficulty as there aged bones creaked as they lifted tired legs and arms in to the boat.

McKenna farted and he knew strait away that he had soiled his long johns. He slid on to his seat and the fêted pants slid across his bum cheeks wedging in his arching crack.  After a few weary strokes of the oars, they cast out in to the dappled water, retrieving their lures at a slow and artificial manner.

Below the boat a strange ghostly shape flashed in and out of the vessels shadow.  
After an hour both were tired and disillusioned at catching nothing. However, they continued to cast deep in to the deep waters of the lake, retrieving there lures in an uneasy fashion as there wrists ached from a combination of arthritis and old age. McKenna’s mind wandered to the coming weekend, and his Daughters impending visit. Meg was sure to moan at the untidy state of his home and remind him that he was to take more care of him self and lay of the booze. She would not be coming alone, and was bringing her fiancé John, who McKenna had not hit it of with when they last met.

Still thinking of the visit by his daughter, McKenna was shaken from his thoughts by Bills shout that he had struck in to something. He turned his aching neck towards Bill just in time to see him tumble out of the boat in to the now calm water. The lake was suddenly awash with spray as Bill struggled to stay afloat as well as holding his rod. Within seconds Bill was submerged and spinning silently through the depths with the air escaping from the corner of his mouth in tinny bubbles.

 As the bubbles rose to the surface McKenna noticed them some twenty feet from the boat and started to panic. Although he could swim, he was in no state to dive in and attempt a rescue. He quickly grabbed the oars and started to steer the boat towards the bubbles. He strained backwards, pulling the old wooden oars with all his strength causing the rusting rowlocks to creak in unison with each pull.

Below the surface, Bill was wondering what was happening as he was no longer straining for breath, and he felt the strength in his body starting to rise with every second. He opened his eyes and stared towards the bottom of the lake and noticed that a bright light was emanating from the lake bed.

 As he moved nearer to the light source he notice movement all about him, but he was unable to make out what the fast moving shimmering shapes were. He knew they were not fish as they were too big, but every time he focused on a shape it disappeared. Finally he was at the bottom of the lake and looking up he could make out the shady shape of the boat being rowed by McKenna. 

McKenna was now totally out of breath having rowed furiously for the last five minutes, his arms were no longer functioning and his fingers were red and blistered. As he sat in the boat thinking that his old friend had surely drowned, the waters broke behind him in an ear shattering crash, making the terrified McKenna swivel his tight stiff neck ninety degrees, towards the source of the noise.

Bill surfaced at speed, exploding across the lake surface creating a mini tidal wave that almost shook McKenna out of the boat.  McKenna stared at Bill with disbelief as he swam towards the still rocking vessel at breakneck speed.

With one casual heave he pulled himself in to the unsteady boat and starting laughing. McKenna coughed up a stick mixture of phlegm and blood as he blurted out a cry of disbelief. Bill shrugged his shoulders and was soon drawing on a roll up taken from a tin in his jacket pocket. Bill motioned towards the oars and grabbed both from there stationary position in the keel, and started to row back to the shore at a rate of knots.  McKenna was speechless as Bill sang at the top of his voice, pulling violently at the splintered oars, and rocking backwards and forwards to the rhythm of an old sea shanty.
Bill had still not said a word as they tied the boat up at the jetty, and collected what remained of their fishing tackle. Bill then turned to McKenna and nodded towards the Woodcutter Inn. 

After storing there tackle in the wooden hut they walked towards the Woodcutter Bill finally spoke to say that there earlier plan to have lunch in the Diner was pants and what they really needed was a proper drink. As they entered the pub, Bill pushed a local lad to one side as he headed for a seat at the bar. The youth turned and stared at Bill muttering under his breath, but before he could take matters further Bill had shoved the startled youngster so hard that he fell across two tables and smashed his face on the floor. He swiftly rose and lunged at Bill, who side stepped him and landed a further crushing blow to the back of his head.

By now the other occupants of the premises had gathered round the fighting duo and pulled the boy away to safety, as his face was covered in blood and he was clearly unable to fight on as Bill stood over him with his fists clenched and ready to deliver further retribution. Bill turned back to the bar and shouted up two beers and motioned to McKenna to take a seat and drink his cold beer.

“What happened down there”, McKenna blurted out as Bill finished his beer and ordered a further couple of beers with Whiskey chasers. “I don’t know” was the reply. All I know is that as I struggled towards the lake bed a sudden energy came over me and I no longer needed to struggle for breath. I saw a light emanating from the lake bed and a heard a strange buzzing in my ears, and before I knew it t was breaking surface and climbing in to the boat looking at your stupid face.

The owner of the premises was soon at there side and asked Bill to refrain from taking Pensioners rights to far, and try and not beat the living daylights out of his customers. However, he was more astonished that Bill was able to fight in such a fashion at his advanced age, and asked him how he did it. Bill turned to the owner and pointed towards the lake and whispered that the water in the lake was far more potent than the weak ale that he was serving them, and that he felt forty years younger than when he woke up in the morning. The owner gestured to McKenna that Bill was already pissed and moved away to serve a customer.

After a couple more beers the still wet Bill turned to McKenna and stared at him blankly, his eyes blood shot and weeping. “We need to go home and talk. I’m not sure what’s happening but I feel like shit”. They both moved towards the door and passed in to the street leaving the still stunned clientele behind them, as they headed towards the lake and onward to their accommodation and food.
McKenna farted as he turned his head back towards the lake and noticed that the island known as “Indian Eyelet” was very prominent, and seemed to shimmer on the horizon. He turned his head back to Bill and noticed that the new found energy seemed to be spent, as he puffed his way to his door, turned the lock and slammed the door in McKenna’s face. 

McKenna turned his back on the slammed door and trudged towards his own home. His head was full of the recent happenings and the strange events that occurred after Bills tumble in to the lake. Soon he was home and as he turned the door handle the phone starting ringing, and he quickly stumbled through the door and reached for the receiver.

“Hello” blurted the old man, and in response a high pitched squeal emanated from the earpiece, forcing McKenna to violently remove the hand set from his ear. Having recovered his momentum, he placed the phone some six inches from his ear and listened. The high pitch squealing had stopped but now a low hum was making his ear and head vibrate as the  low frequency continued to vibrate in the still dark room. The uncomfortable  noise intensified until it suddenly stopped causing McKenna to throw the hand set to the floor.

Slowly reaching to pick up the phone , his back ached as he bent his old back downwards to the floor. Grabbing the phone and carefully placing it to his ear, it was now silent. McKenna placed the receiver and moved across the sitting room to flick the light switch and the room was soon enveloped in light.

McKenna sat with his head in his hands and started to wonder if he was loosing his sanity. He closed his old dry eyes and pushed his legs out in front off him, and soon he was asleep. 

He was soon dreaming, and found himself as a young man standing outside his childhood home. The idyllic white cottage was partially covered in ivy and smoke was rising from the crooked chimney.

The younger McKenna was standing in the garden beside a huge apple tree, with wind fallen apples about his feet. Dark crows swooped above his head in the grey sky, as frightened sheep huddled in to groups in the adjacent field. Further in the  distance, the steep slopes were shrouded in thick forest, the pine trees stretching far in to the distance, until vanishing as the horizon merged with the sky. 

In his dream he glanced around the garden towards the cottage well, where an old man dressed in strange clothing sat whittling a piece of wood.

Back in his chair, McKenna twitched in his sleep as he dreamt of the strange figure by the well, his subconscious brain remembering something that scared him, but the reason temporary being lost to him.
 In the dream, McKenna moved towards the well with an effortless gait that reminded him of his pre injury youth. Reaching the well, the strangely clothed man put down his knife and the wood he was carving, and turned to face the approaching figure. As the face of the stranger in his dream was revealed to the youthful McKenna, the sleeping old man jumped in his sleep, his old heart racing and his blood pressure reaching near fatal levels.

However, he did not awaken, and in his dream he was staring in to the old and twisted, blood stained face of his long dead brother, John !.

John had died as a twelve year old child when he fell down the very same well that they were now standing next to. However, the tortured face now staring at McKenna was that of an old man, whose creased and weathered face stared tearfully in to his eyes.

It was never established how or why John fell in to the deep well, but when he went missing there parents frantically searched for him in the local fields,woods and river,finally finding him when the young McKenna noticed a shoe by the well. Their father soon discovered the body of his son at the bottom of the flooded pit, and recovered the limp lifeless body, who was then buried in the local graveyard, two miles from the cottage. 

Although never mentioned out loud, the local community had long suspected that McKenna had pushed his brother in to the well, as it was well known that they were not the best of friends. However, there Father had put stop to the rumours by letting it be known that McKenna had been with him at the time of the incident.
All the same, both McKenna and his father new this to be a lie, and his father was never sure of his remaining son’s involvement in the tragedy.
  

McKenna again twitched in his chair as he continued to dream. As he dreamt, the doors of his home began to quietly rattle and the windows started to flow with small rivulets of condensation. The phone which had earlier been thrown to the flow began to emit a slow hum, but McKenna did still not wake from his disturbed sleep.

 In the corner of the room something moved across the damp floor, as simultaneously the air in the room began to reek with the smell of crushed almonds and stale parmesan cheese.   

 Two hours passed as McKenna lay lifeless in his now sodden wet living room. His nose twitched with the strange smell pervaded his flaying nostrils. The condensation was now
pouring off the windows and collecting in large pools of mildew and microbe infested water, before spreading across the floor and turning the carpet in to a sodden mess.

The damp had penetrated McKenna’s socks and they were now hanging off his spindly legs hanging in a spongy mess about his ankles. The thin skin around his lower legs was red and puffy and lesions were forming on his shins.

To add to the soaking misery that had overcome the old man as he sat in his old hard armchair, McKenna has also wet himself, and the warm urine had overcome the defences of his already soiled and matted underwear, and was running down his legs to mingle with the already sodden socks creating a putrid mess about his sore aching feet.

Every so often a shadow would move from a corner of the room, as if a rat or mouse had suddenly scampered in to room and quickly turned to hide in a dark corner. However, these shadows were far larger than even the greatest Black or Brown Rat, and in deed no member of the Rattus Norvegicus family had ever reached such a size, even hanging around down in the sewer gorging on peaches and impersonating an ugly princess of the streets.

The shadow moved silently and without interruption. However there was not just one shadow but numerous dark shapes flitting around in every corner and recess of the damp stinking room. Soon the room was almost one continuous moving shadow
encircling the prostate body slumped asleep on the chair.

McKenna suddenly twitched and opened his eyes.
McKenna squealed in horror as standing in front of him was his long dead brother. In a state of severe shock McKenna pushed his old and withered arms down on to the arm rests of his chair so as to lever his body on to his feet. The first attempt failed as his sodden feet and ankles collapsed under his body weight. He again strained against the arm rests and this time successfully levered his aching body to his feet. There in front of him was his deceased brother, no older then the tender age that he had fallen, or been pushed, down the well all those years earlier.
A trickle of urine ran down the old mans leg as he lurched forward in an attempt to embrace his sibling. However, this attempt failed as he grasped at the figure some three feet in front of him. Regaining his composure he took a couple of stumbling steps towards his target and throwing himself forward landed face first on the damp carpet. As he lay in a crumpled mass of urine, sweat and stinking mildew, his ears strained to a faint cry emanating from behind him. Pushing one hand in front of the other, the old man struggled to turn his prostrate head towards the faint speech. His boil covered neck creaked as the thin skin twisted and cracked with the movement of his head.
 Once he had managed to turn and face his deceased brother, he recoiled with horror to note that the room was completely empty, and that there no sign of the source of the faint speech. His head ached with pain as he strained his swollen and blood shot eyes around his living room.
Not a sound and not a movement.
 He slowly pushed his tired body to a standing position, and slowly trudged towards the locked door.  Opening the door he stared up and down the street hoping to catch a glimpse of his brother. Alas, there was no one in sight, and trying to reflect on the recent happenings, turned back in to his premises locking and bolting the door behind him.  Feeling sad and bewildered, McKenna went strait to his bed and without undressing threw his body on to the soled sheets, and within five minutes was again asleep.
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Unknown to McKenna, located approximately fifty feet below his home was a labyrinth of dark tunnels excavated centuries earlier by Irish monks who had settled in the area after crossing the Atlantic in their hand crafted vessels years before Columbus’s supposed discovery of the new world !.  These tunnels were used by the monks to evade the local native Indians who had objected to there presence, and had set about exterminating them by raiding their settlements and murdering all they could capture with the tomahawk or arrow.    The monks who had arrived on the coast of the new world were fleeing from persecution in Ireland and had been joined by fellow Welsh monks who were suffering from the same predicament.
After one particularly fierce attack by the natives, a strong albino monk who was known simply by the Greek letter “Theta” had discovered an entrance to a small cave that appeared to lead in to a series of other caverns. Theta quickly advised the other Monks of his discovery. And soon they were excavating the lose soil in the cave to try and get to the other caverns. They quickly noticed that the soil was easy to remove, but was still of a solid consistency that would be ideal for tunneling. Thus, over a number of months an elaborate series of tunnels were excavated by the surviving brethren.
Before long, the network of tunnels was of sufficient scale for the monks to evade their attackers on a regular basis, and prevent their numbers from decreasing. After a period if three years a major chamber had been excavated so that religious festivals and ceremonies could be held underground away from the prying eyes of the savages above.  
As the years past, the community of subterranean monks continued to flourish with no further contact with the old world.

However, occasional visits to the surface were accompanied by savage encounters with the native indigenous people, who were relentless in their continued attacks upon the pious Irish and Welsh monks.

As back in their homelands, the religious community was under relentless and continued attack, which led over time to a gradual change in the DNA and Mitochondrial DNA of the unsettled Monks.

Due to the unconventional nature of their existence, the Monks had altered their vows of celibacy, so as to enable the community to grow. In this respect, regular raiding parties were released to the surface so as to capture and enslave local Indian woman as breeding stock.

The resulting mixture of blood, chromosomes and DNA, together with the evolutionary changes enforced upon them by their subterranean life style, resulted in a new sub classification of Homo Sapiens, which in effect was a throwback to the muscular structure and brain size of the long extinct Neanderthal’s that roamed Europe and the near east before and during the ice age.

After many centuries, the religious community residing beneath the sleepy town and lake, had morphed in to oversize Neanderthal like zealots, whose only reason for existence was to raid the surface for new breeding stock, and worship at their monolithic shrine, located at the centre of their community, in the huge open space hewn from the rocks and soil centuries earlier. 

The monolithic shrine was constructed of a huge hollowed out granite megalith, covered with layers of gold, silver and filled with mercury.
The construction of this object of worship had been undertaken by the original subterranean residents after consulting documents that an Irish monk had obtained on a visit to Egypt and Babylon whilst seeking religious enlightenment and secretes of the ancients.

As a result of the elements used in its construction, it was soon noticed that the monument had strange powers that can now be described as electro magnetic.

Objects would move without touch if close to the edifice, and changes to the surface of the lake were often noticed by those traveling or swimming in the deep cobalt waters.

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Meanwhile, McKenna, lay in his bed and suddenly awoke to the sound of an approaching car and a loud radio disturbing the peace of the tranquil setting by the shore of the lake.

McKenna strained his eyes, staring out the grubby window, and immediately noticed that his daughter had arrived with her boyfriend and a couple of old college friends.  He strained his mind and started to remember her earlier proclamation that she was to visit her father so that she and her friends could go fishing on the lake.

At that moment he glanced towards the cold waters and noticed a strange shimmer emanating from the dark deep waters, particularly resonant adjacent to the shore of the island in the near distance.    

His thoughts twisted to the recent strange events whilst he was fishing on the lake and a strong feeling of terror spread through the soft grey matter residing in his cracked cranium as he thought of his daughter venturing out on to the watery expanse before him.

He grabbed an old pair of binoculars laying on the bed side table and was soon grimacing as he stared at the island. As if he knew what to expect, he noticed movement amongst the bushes surrounding the bank, although he was unable to make out the nature of the things moving, he was sure that they were malevolent, and a cold sweat run down the nape of his neck accompanied by a sickly dribble slipping from the corner of his dry and chapped mouth.

McKenna placed the binoculars on the coffee table and wiped the sweat from his neck. His concentration was immediately broken by a large thud on his door as his daughter and friends gathered outside his house.

The old man slowly moved to the door and after with drawing the bolt and slipping the catch, gentle pulled the wooden door open, enabling the youthful ensemble to enter his home. 

His athletic daughter Meg, hugged her father and placed a kiss upon his puffy red cheeks. Her friends shook hands with the slightly embarrassed old timer, as he gestured for them to be seated.
The tall and muscular boyfriend started to ask the usual inane questions when facing an uncomfortable situation, and blabbered on about the journey to the hamlet and how he was looking forward to getting to grips with the local pike and bass.

At this suggestion McKenna stood up abruptly and shakily pushed out his weak arm to grasp the hand of his daughter’s suitor.

Grabbing his large hand McKenna gripped it with all his strength as he forcefully retorted that they were not to venture on to the lake at any cost. Quickly gesticulating towards the lake and screeching that the lake was alive and that it wished to consume those who were foolish enough to break its dark mesmerising waters.

Meg stared at her father in disbelief, as she remembered the many happy days spent during her youth fishing and generally messing about in a boat, on the familiar waters of the lake. She placed her arms around her father shoulders and asked why he was so upset by their plans to relax on the lake.

He raised his head so that his eyes were level with her heavily made up own, and whilst staring wildly in to her eyes, shouted that things had changed and that the devil himself now resided either in or under the waters.
The assembled youths looked in to each others eyes and secretly gestured that the old boy was either loosing his marbles or intoxicated.      


Just as the atmosphere in the room was becoming unbearable a thump and crash from the direction of the hallway indicated that Bill Fletcher was at the door.

Bill was also worried about McKenna, and was also puzzled by the recent events that the two old friends had encountered over the last few days. Meg hastened to the door letting Bill in to the house, hoping that his entrance would clear the unsettling atmosphere and allow everyone to relax.    

Bill entered the room and pulled McKenna to one side.  

Asking what the young interlopers were doing in his house, Bill soon indicated that they needed to leave the premises and talk privately. Shrugging his shoulders McKenna pulled an old jacket from behind the door and gestured to leave. Saying his goodbyes to his daughter and her friends he again stressed that the lake was off bounds and they were not to venture near its waters.  

The old timers were soon in deep discussion as they ambled along the lake side path. After half a mile, they came to an abrupt halt as they faced each other whilst engaged in a heated argument. Within seconds they were wrestling on the ground and minutes later were both waist deep in the waters of the lake. As they struggled to disadvantage each other in their struggle for supremacy, neither noticed the  strange contours and patterns forming on the waters surface.

As Mckenna pushed his fingers in to the eyes of his erstwhile friend , he felt a hand grab his left leg for an ever so brief moment, and then felt a strong sensation that his right leg was being entwined by a strong but flexible agent. He pulled his fingers from Bill's blooded eyes and pushed his arms and hands beneath the water, towards whatever was encroaching on his personal space.

Bill pulled his head back and whilst screaming obscenities at McKenna noticed that the waters about them were in turmoil. He sniffed the air and noticed a familiar but strange odour that immediately reminded him of the old warehouse where McKenna was the caretaker.


Whilst the old men were tumbling about the waters of the lake, Meg and here friends were pushing of from the landing stage adjacent to McKenna's premises, with their moderately sized boat loaded with a full array of fishing and camping gear. Crates of bottled beer and an assortment of cold snacks and easy to cook ready meals were also stored aboard. 

Meg turned to her boyfriend Mike, and asked if they were doing the right thing. Mike quickly replied that her father was unhinged and that the sooner they crossed the lake and disembarked at the island, the sooner they would begin to enjoy themselves.  

McKenna, who had ceased his struggle with Bill, was also noticing the strong aroma and whilst reaching down to establish whether his legs were free from any encumbrance, stumbled over to become completely immersed in the lakes cobalt waters. Just before his head sank below the surface of the cold lake, his tired, bloodshot and streaming eyes noticed three quick flashes of light emanating from the banks of the distant island.

He also had the sensation of movement along the banks of the island in the split seconds between the flashes, and his thoughts immediately turned to the occasion earlier in the summer, when he knew something moved by the warehouse, but was unable to actually see or detect an object.

 However, then, as now, the sensation that there was something palpable and malevolent was so strong that  his backbone shook with an ice cold chill as he sank below the waters. 



As McKenna sank below the waters, Meg and her companions disembarked from their small vessel and laboriously transferred their camping gear and fishing tackle to a base camp that had quickly been established ashore.


Meg’s fiancé, John, had quickly established leadership of the small group and was enthusiastically supervising the erection of the tents and pointing to where various seats and bundles of goods were to be positioned. Their progress was suddenly interrupted by a loud thud as a medium sized rock fell to the ground amongst them.  There was no high ground next to them and the only origination could have been from someone throwing the projectile towards them in a deliberate manner.

Meg stared at John and motioned to the others to keep quiet and remain motionless. After a couple of seconds John moved towards the rock and picked it up to examine it. It was approximately the size of a bowling ball, and appeared to have been fashioned from quartz, or feldspar. It was obvious that this was a manufactured entity, and that it must have been heaved at them by a very powerful entity due to its weight, and the velocity that it had been hurled towards them.
Meg’s thoughts quickly turned to the warning that her father had given her and began to wish that she had heeded his insistence that they stay away from the lake and Island.

Indian Eyelet had always been mysterious to Meg, and she remembered many occasions in her childhood when she thought that something or someone was trying to catch her attention as she played alone on the lake shore.

Meanwhile back in the cold waters of the lake, Bill dived below the surface in search of McKenna. Bill soon noticed an increased vigour as he swept his way towards the string of small bubbles hopefully emanating from McKenna’s desperate struggles as he was dragged in to the depths of the lake. As Bills decent quickened due to his increased strength, he noticed that a series of light sources that appeared to flicker in a deliberate order, not unlike landing lights at an airport or airstrip.

 Bill followed the ever increasing lights, there intensity increasing as he moved closure to their source, and was soon at the base of a steep underwater cliff. His hands searched the vertical wall for a clue as to where McKenna may have gone, and was relieved to notice a series of indentations that enabled him to pull his now increasingly powerful body through a previously unseen gap in the rock face.

On the surface, the waters were now perfectly still and a crescent moon was glowing in the cloud free evening sky as the remaining daylight quickly faded. Meg and her companions had decided that the “rock incident” was a one off, and had continued to make their base camp in preparation for a nights drinking and fishing. After cracking open a few tins of beer, John needed to take a leak and marched away from the lake shore so that he could urinate in peace. Having wandered what he considered a safe distance from the encampment, he stood readying himself facing a clump of old brushwood and Pine trees.

As he pulled down his zipper, momentarily putting himself in a vulnerable position, a pair of giant ape like hairy hands emerged from the undergrowth and yanked him in to the undergrowth.  Without a sound John had vanished and as his prone body was being carried towards a hidden cave entrance, Meg and the others giggled to themselves as they sipped wine and beer around the crackling and snapping fire at their lakeside encampment.

Bill Fletcher was now pulling his old body from the cold waters concealed within a deep rock chamber that he had entered through the secrete entrance in the underwater rock face. He quickly noticed a figure sitting huddled against the caves wall, and on investigation was pleased to see that it was McKenna. McKenna was looking very pale and week, and unlike Bill, did not seem to receive a burst of energy when immersed in the cobalt waters of the lake.   McKenna tried to speak, but a bloated tongue prevented any speech from exuding from his feeble mouth. His split lips were purple and his eyes bloodshot and dilated.

On the Island, John was now semi conscious and was aware that he was being manipulated by a number of huge Neanderthal like figures clothed in monastic habits and chanting in an incomprehensible dialogue of old Latin, tainted with Celtic and Anglo Saxon undertones.  He was also only too aware that he was completely naked and being violated by a markedly smaller, and possibly effeminate entity who was milking his member for semen and its inherent DNA.