TAKEOVER BID OUTRAGE AT THE DUCK FLAT CAP SOCIETY
Corporate raiders from the middle east have outraged the membership of the fabled Duck Flat Cap Society (DFCS) by tabling a bid for the Society.
The bid has been fronted by the flamboyant snuff, oil and sand potentate, Sheik Horse Ibn El Lot.
The secretive magnate has been known to London's wealthy elite for many years, after elaborately establishing his name during a hard fought battle for the control of the local snuff trade.
The bat tle for control of the nasal additive was eventually won by the sheik by his underhand manipulation of the addictive powders supply chain. His control of the lucrative substance has been absolute ever since he established his hegemony over the snuff barons, and he has never shown any willingness to weaken his hand.
The substance is at the centre of his plan to purchase the Duck Flat Cap society, as he is aware that the societies national membership are addicted to the liquid version of the substance, which is sold under various pseudonym's throughout the pubs, hostelries, bars and clubs of England.
The DFCS are in full agreement that this foul attempt to take control of the society has to be defended at all cost.
Driver Chard of El Hadj Duiff has been appointed temporary chairman of the select subcommittee set up to defend the society from the evil grasp of the oil maddened potentate Sheik Horse Ibn El Lot.
A full meeting of the committee is to be held within the next couple of days when it is expected that ex military hard man, travel agent and sexologist, Basher Hurley will be appointed as military adviser.
His initial approach is expected to employ agents to infiltrate the sheiks senior command, in an attempt to discover the oil barons soft spot.
It is also believed that Bazzer Duck and failed Karaoke singer Ray the Dust will be employed as special agents, with a strategy of engaging the sand, oil and Snuff merchants colleagues and operatives with destabilising talk of the local snuff trade drying up and the price of the commodity imploding over the next few months.
Further details will be released after the proposed meeting of the subcommittee.
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