DAVOS BREAKTHROUGH FOR THE DUCK FLAT CAP SOCIETY
In
sensational but unsubstantiated news, the Duck Flat Cap Society has allegedly
been invited to the World Economic Forum in Davos, a small town in the Swiss
Alps, within the canton of Graubünden.
The
popular winter sports resort with its conference centre that hosts the annual
World Economic Forum is ablaze with rumour and gossip after an unsubstantiated
press release by the” Barrow in Furness, St Petersburg and Ulan Bator Institute
of Mastication” stated that “Dave the
Teach”, a failed Tupperware salesman and general roustabout, would head up the Duck Flat Cap Societies entourage at the global event.
The event
that is to be visited by over 40 heads of state and government, as well as
2,500 leaders from business and society will discuss “Mastering the Fourth
Industrial Revolution” under the themes of security, climate change, global
growth and commodity prices.
It is
believed that Dave the Teach is currently ensconced in a safe house located in
the Provence area of France, where he has been in hiding from an enraged Driver
Chard. This follows an unsavoury recent incident at the local Blood and Guts
Services Rendered Club, where Driver Chard confronted Dave the Teach over his
industrial language.
It is alleged that the Teach verbally attacked
a blind shoe shine boy for not affecting a sufficient shine to his carpet
slippers. However it is believed that this onslaught has its origins with the
unfortunate shoe shine boys mother who was allegedly Dave the Teach’ s personal
haberdasher and valet when the Teach was
the principle at a private school in a remote location in a canton on the Swiss / Liechtenstein border.
Returning
to Davos, it is during his prolonged stay in the Alpine region, that Dave the
Teach forged links with various important dignitaries and influential Swiss and
Tyrolean members of government, whilst roaming the countryside in a battered Mini. It is believed that it is theses links that
have enabled the Duck Flat Cap Society to gain an alleged seat at the up and
coming forum.
These same
unsubstantiated reports emanating from the” Barrow in Furness, St Petersburg
and Ulan Bator Institute of Mastication” indicate that the Society will be
looking for a deal to limit the involvement of the European Community, The
White House and other worldwide governmental and industrial institutions, in
the governance of fiduciary, fiscal and other matters relating to the free
movement of Flat Cap Assets and members throughout the world wide community.
The
unsubstantiated reports go on to state that policy makers in the far east and south America, where the Duck Flat Cap Society are
allegedly setting up affiliates, are being actively lobbied to allow the standard Flat Cap Society rules and regulations to apply without
any interference from the state.
Further
details will be posted when we receive a report from Dave the Teach.
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