THE DUCK HUNTER
Driver Chard of El Hadj Duiff has astonished the members of the "Duck Flat Cap Society" and in particular the ruling elite of the "Central Council", by claiming that the society was engaged in highly classified "Black projects" in south east Asia during the French Indochina crisis and the Vietnamese war.
The geriatric octogenarian warmonger claims that when he was seconded to the Egyptian secrete service during his military service, he was asked to assist the British , American and Egyptian high command in their top secrete operations to understand Soviet and Chinese intentions in the strategic North East area of Africa.
During these briefings Driver Chard let it be known to the High Command that he was a member of the Duck Flat Cap Society that for scores of years had kept close links with the British military installations located at Bentley Priory and Stanmore Park in Harrow and Wealdstone / Stanmore area of North West London.
RAF Bentley Priory was a non-flying Royal Air Force station near Stanmore in the London Borough of Harrow. It was famous as the headquarters of Fighter Command during the Battle of Britain and the Second World War.
Little known to the public, a series of tunnels and passages linked the Bentley Priory buildings to the nearby Stanmore Park barrage balloon post , where the tunnels were further linked to the Duck In the Pond public house and HQ of the Duck Flat Cap Society.
As previously reported on theses pages Winston Churchill was allegedly known to traverse these dark passages so that he could delight his taste buds with a couple of pints of best British Bitter, via a secure door that opened in to the beer cellar of the Duck In the Pond.
It was during one of these secretive visits that a young Driver Chard allegedly encountered Winston enjoying a pint of Best whilst drawing on a twelve inch cigar whilst reading the minutes of the last Duck Flat Cap Society "Imbibing, spying and procrastinating" sub committee board meeting. This encounter led to unconfirmed reports that the British Prime Minister becoming a fully paid up member of the Duck Flat Cap Society, although his membership was kept secrete until revealed a number of years ago by Driver Chard.
This link between the D.F.C.S and the the military was forged ever closer during the final years of world war 2, and the Korean conflict, with agents being supplied to infiltrate the drinking establishments of enemy cities throughout occupied Europe and eventually the far east. It was via this link that Driver Chard was able to reveal to the various high commands in North Africa that he had the means to enable closer relations with the French by assisting with their operations in Indochina.
The initial response was to parachute several agents in to Annam and Cochinchine, who were strategically trained to be able to consume a minimum of twenty pints of stout, best bitter or larger at a sitting.
Due to the French influence in the areas being infiltrated, particular brands of French larger had been mad available to the agents to ensure that excess gas intake would not detour them from there intended mission of debilitating the imbibing military elite of the targeted areas by engaging in prolonged bouts of boozing with targeted officers.
Operations were successful during the French engagement but as history shows, there general military weakness and ineffective government eventually led to the French evacuation of Indochina and the establishment of individual states.
In time the USA intervened in the area to try and stop a domino effect of increasing Communist control, as the Chinese equipped Viet Cong and others, tried to overthrow the legitimate governmental successors to French Colonial rule. As the American involvement grew, so did the undercover operations of the Duck Flat Cap society, with new operatives being dropped in to strategic military positions, especially those to be targeted for Napalm attacks.
The agents were also specially trained in the subtle art of "Russian Roulette", although it s true to recount that a number of operatives were lost after an unfortunate indecent at the training base in Bisley, when brandy was substituted for best bitter in a back room game of "Chicken".
Operations continued for a number of years, but during the late 1960's the availability of agents began to drop off, as the need for alcohol petered out among younger recruits to the D.F.C.S, mainly due to the uptake of marijuana and a clamp down of drinking and driving leading to less clientele at the pubs and bars of England.
Eventually, the Ruling Council of the "Military and Procrastinating" sub committee decided to withdraw from Vietnam, and if you view the news footage of the last helicopter escaping from Saigon, you can just make out the portly figure of agent "Dust" forcing his way to safety.
Further details will be posted after Driver Chard has recovered from his latest bout of Mad Albert disease.
R.I.P JOHN CHARD 1933 - 2020
Driver Chard of El Hadj Duiff has astonished the members of the "Duck Flat Cap Society" and in particular the ruling elite of the "Central Council", by claiming that the society was engaged in highly classified "Black projects" in south east Asia during the French Indochina crisis and the Vietnamese war.
The geriatric octogenarian warmonger claims that when he was seconded to the Egyptian secrete service during his military service, he was asked to assist the British , American and Egyptian high command in their top secrete operations to understand Soviet and Chinese intentions in the strategic North East area of Africa.
During these briefings Driver Chard let it be known to the High Command that he was a member of the Duck Flat Cap Society that for scores of years had kept close links with the British military installations located at Bentley Priory and Stanmore Park in Harrow and Wealdstone / Stanmore area of North West London.RAF Bentley Priory was a non-flying Royal Air Force station near Stanmore in the London Borough of Harrow. It was famous as the headquarters of Fighter Command during the Battle of Britain and the Second World War.
Little known to the public, a series of tunnels and passages linked the Bentley Priory buildings to the nearby Stanmore Park barrage balloon post , where the tunnels were further linked to the Duck In the Pond public house and HQ of the Duck Flat Cap Society.
As previously reported on theses pages Winston Churchill was allegedly known to traverse these dark passages so that he could delight his taste buds with a couple of pints of best British Bitter, via a secure door that opened in to the beer cellar of the Duck In the Pond.
It was during one of these secretive visits that a young Driver Chard allegedly encountered Winston enjoying a pint of Best whilst drawing on a twelve inch cigar whilst reading the minutes of the last Duck Flat Cap Society "Imbibing, spying and procrastinating" sub committee board meeting. This encounter led to unconfirmed reports that the British Prime Minister becoming a fully paid up member of the Duck Flat Cap Society, although his membership was kept secrete until revealed a number of years ago by Driver Chard.
This link between the D.F.C.S and the the military was forged ever closer during the final years of world war 2, and the Korean conflict, with agents being supplied to infiltrate the drinking establishments of enemy cities throughout occupied Europe and eventually the far east. It was via this link that Driver Chard was able to reveal to the various high commands in North Africa that he had the means to enable closer relations with the French by assisting with their operations in Indochina.
The initial response was to parachute several agents in to Annam and Cochinchine, who were strategically trained to be able to consume a minimum of twenty pints of stout, best bitter or larger at a sitting.
Due to the French influence in the areas being infiltrated, particular brands of French larger had been mad available to the agents to ensure that excess gas intake would not detour them from there intended mission of debilitating the imbibing military elite of the targeted areas by engaging in prolonged bouts of boozing with targeted officers.
Operations were successful during the French engagement but as history shows, there general military weakness and ineffective government eventually led to the French evacuation of Indochina and the establishment of individual states.
In time the USA intervened in the area to try and stop a domino effect of increasing Communist control, as the Chinese equipped Viet Cong and others, tried to overthrow the legitimate governmental successors to French Colonial rule. As the American involvement grew, so did the undercover operations of the Duck Flat Cap society, with new operatives being dropped in to strategic military positions, especially those to be targeted for Napalm attacks.
The agents were also specially trained in the subtle art of "Russian Roulette", although it s true to recount that a number of operatives were lost after an unfortunate indecent at the training base in Bisley, when brandy was substituted for best bitter in a back room game of "Chicken".
Operations continued for a number of years, but during the late 1960's the availability of agents began to drop off, as the need for alcohol petered out among younger recruits to the D.F.C.S, mainly due to the uptake of marijuana and a clamp down of drinking and driving leading to less clientele at the pubs and bars of England.
Eventually, the Ruling Council of the "Military and Procrastinating" sub committee decided to withdraw from Vietnam, and if you view the news footage of the last helicopter escaping from Saigon, you can just make out the portly figure of agent "Dust" forcing his way to safety.
Further details will be posted after Driver Chard has recovered from his latest bout of Mad Albert disease.
R.I.P JOHN CHARD 1933 - 2020
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