THE ABOMINABLE MAJOR THURLBY

 THE ABOMINABLE MAJOR THURLBY 

The lonely Nazi spy was known to occasionally enjoy a few beers and often sat alone in the Railway Hotel, now known as the Village Inn, located on the corner of Ealing Road and Wembley High Road.

He soon became known to the regulars as the “Major” or “Major Thurlby” and became the subject of various rumours regarding his sexuality and his actual profession or job.

He was never short of cash for a pint of best bitter or a large scotch whisky, but none of the clientele had ever noticed the well dressed Major acting in any professional capacity or even as a senior clerk in the many affluent stores that then lined the High Road. 

However, most pushed their thoughts to the back of their minds as the air raid siren screamed the alarm, alerting the unlucky imbibers to the fact that the Nazi Luftwaffe were again unleashing their explosive load upon the defenceless populace below their dive-bombing stukers and Junkers.

They were of course unaware that just a few hours earlier, the Major had radioed the coordinates of the large Power Station located at the end of Copeland playing fields and adjacent to the main line railway link with Euston, to his handlers in Berlin.

He was confidently aware that the target of the high explosives raining from the bellies of the Luftwaffe’s finest was not for the benefit of the High Road but would fall approximately a mile away, wreaking destruction and mayhem amongst the cooling towers and turbines of the power station.

The Major sunk the dregs of his pint, picked up his trilby and exited the pub via the street entrance and strolled fifty yards down the road towards St Johns church and the Police Station.

Pausing briefly to adjust his trilby, he stepped up the steps at the entrance to the police station and extended his outstretched hand to the desk sergeant. The sergeant lifted his head and smiled at the Major.

Unknown to the Major, these very acts were being secretly observed by an associate of the Duck Flat Cap Society known only as “Bolt foot Jones”.

Bolt Foot Jones was a regular of the Mitre Public house, and was originally enthused by the Majors care free manor whilst contesting a three way Green Bowls competition, between the Railway Hotel, the Century Hotel and the Mitre public house.  

The sergeant was well acquainted with The Major, and due to his feeble lack of authority and organisational skills, had allowed the Nazi spy to gain unauthorised access to Police files and ledgers. He had even granted the "Major" auxiliary policing powers, that extended to use of police boxes and whistles during the Black Out.   

This unfortunate friendship enabled the Major to make detailed notes detailing secrets from various files and ledgers, and the way the Police station operated, which like all others in the UK was on a war footing. However, Bolt Foot was on the Majors trail and continued to log his movements throughout the early months of 1941. 

Among the documents recently uncovered by the Duck Flat Cap Society was a copy of Bolt Foots log and this is how we know of his counter clandestine activities. The log was, however stored with the personal papers of The Major, which unfortunately indicates that Bolt Foots activities were discovered by the Major. The records continue to be perused and details of the outcome of his discovery will be published in due course.

Further reading of the documentation discovered in the Thurlby Road residence indicates that the Major was also involved with the unsuccessful assassination of Adolf Hitler in 1944 at the Wolfs Lair, in a plot that involved Claus Von Stauffenberg and a certain Von Blumenthal.

 The record books show that the assassination plot was planned by a Major Hans-Jürgen von Blumenthal. The intriguing point being that the recently uncovered documentation indicates that Blumenthal was a known alias of the Major, therefore implicating the same Nazi spy who guided the Luftwaffe to destroy a Wembley Power Station as a main player in an assassination plot of the fuhrer.

Further details of the Duck Flat Cap Societies research will be released in due course. 

http://horsingtonsmythe.blogspot.co.uk/2012/08/major-thurlby-and-house-of-milk.html
//horsingtonsmythe.blogspot.co.uk/2012/07/nazi-outrage-at-home-of-english-football.html
http://horsingtonsmythe.blogspot.co.uk/2012/11/major-thurlby-and-red-faced-doctor.html 

                                

NAZI OUTRAGE AT HOME OF ENGLISH FOOTBALL

NAZI OUTRAGE AT HOME OF ENGLISH FOOTBALL

Recently uncovered documents have revealed the alleged sordid double life of a wartime Nazi spy, living amongst the inhabitants of John Betjamins leafy suburban metro-land.

The north west London  town of Wembley, is famous throughout the world for its status as home of English and world football. The original Wembley Stadium was built in 1923 as part of the British Empire Exhibition, that was built across sprawling parkland to the north of the sleepy village of Wembley.

The land was previously the private estate attached to the local Manor House known as the White House, and as well as the stadium consisted of an array of marvelous pavilions and and building mimicking the architectural style from across the worldwide British Empire.

 During the 1930's the small village grew in to a small town but continued to be a quite retreat from the hustle and bustle of nearby metropolitan London. Easy rail links enabled commuters to live an Elysian life in the leafy avenues of Wembley, with easy access to both the nearby open countryside, and the office in the City.

By the start of the 2nd World War, Wembley was a favourite place of residence for the middle class with its neat semi detached and detached freehold properties, inter mingled with spacious bungalows and well built mansion flats.
These well built properties, together with the parades of well provisioned shops and stores, ensured that the population of Wembley was a mixture of the professional elite upper middle class and the middle of the road artisan who worked hard and prospered in the leafy suburbs of Wembley and its nearby small towns of Kingsbury, Harrow, Kenton, Preston and Sudbury.

However, as the bombs began to fall on the red tiled roofs, if the recently uncovered evidence is to be believed, amongst the well healed and King loving English populace was a heinous Nazi spy, who had ensconced his way in to the local fabric of the town and even managed to create close links to the local police.

Thurlby Road was a short road built at the turn of the last century, located close to the junction of the Ealing Road with Wembley High Road. The red brick Victorian houses lining the road were typical of those built at the end of the Victorian era and the start of the Edwardian age. The houses were stoutly constructed although relatively small compared to the larger villas constructed in more attractive parts of the town.

As the local populace gathered about the wireless awaiting news of the impending attack on their homeland by the Nazi war machine, the resident of the humble Thurlby Road property was seated at his small kitchen table perusing his code book prior to sending encoded messages to Berlin.

This alleged evil Nazi was known to those who knew him as either Alf or the Major, but unknown to them his real name was Herman Von Ruderham, a holder of the Iron Cross and former Reichs Commander of the Wehrmacht.

Having fought in the first world war on the Russian Front he has slipped in to England at the start of the financial crisis known as the Wall Street Crash.

 His code book was a guide to German Grammar, with his German commanders using an identical book for the translation and decipher of the coded message. 

As an elected member of the borough council he had quietly assimilated himself in to the local community and had obtained access to the local police station by way of making acquaintance's with the local Sergeant and a number of constables.

 However, using this screen of respectability, he was quietly recording the comings and goings of the police officers and recording the times and dates in a paper log.

 A paper copy of the log has now been recovered by the Military Intelligence division of the Duck Flay Cap Society, and is reproduced here for your perusal.

 The details of this log would then be transmitted by radio to his handlers in the Berlin high command, and would be invaluable information as and when the proposed invasion of England by the Nazi war machine took place.

 

The Major was also allegedly involved with recruiting Japanese spies from the local community and was greatly concerned that Chinese nationals were not recruited in error, as they were the sworn enemies of the Japanese who were controlling huge areas of China after their military invasion.

Evidence of this recruiting has been uncovered by way of a communication detailing how to differentiated the Japanese race from that of the Chinese. This document has been discovered along with other incriminating documentation, and is also reproduced here as evidence of these heinous crimes against the English nation.
 
Further investigations in to this sordid affair are to be conducted by the Military Intelligence division of the Duck Flat Cap Society, and reports will be posted in due course.

http://horsingtonsmythe.blogspot.co.uk/2012/11/major-thurlby-and-red-faced-doctor.html

THE STRANGE CASE OF THE SLOW BOAT TO CHINA

THE STRANGE CASE  OF THE SLOW BOAT TO CHINA

In 1924 a band of courageous roustabouts made their way to the British Empire Exhibition at Wembley Park, and initiated a bold plan for their escape from poverty and servitude.

The group of working class scoundrels were all local and had marvelled as the former gracious park lands of the White House,  the Manor House situated in the sumptuous rolling parkland of Wembley Park, had been transformed in to the monstrous stone and reinforced concrete edifice that now stood before and about them.

The local scenery had started its miraculous transformation during the 1850's when the London Metropolitan Railway had thrust is serpentine way directly through the Wembley Park Estate on its bold way from Baker Street in London, to Harrow On the Hill and onward to the bountiful countryside of Hertfordshire and Buckinghamshire beyond.

Indeed, as a precursor to the Exhibition now spread across the former open green fields, The Director and principle shareholder of the company responsible for constructing the railroad that dissected the parkland, had made a promise to construct a Tower greater than that constructed by Monsieur Gustaf Eiffel in gay Paris.

 This Tower was indeed started but failed after the first stage due to the marshy sate of the ground under the great four legged structure, and a lack of funding for the project. The Tower being eventually abandoned and known throughout the area as "Watkins Folly" after the name of its proposer.

Returning to our protagonists, all were either in the service of one of the remaining great houses of Wembley Sudbury or Neasden, and were convinced that the only way to escape their tedious existence was to travel to the fabled eastern land of Cathay, otherwise known as China.

The group had had little or no schooling between them and although each could write their name, only David Thrump was able to read, mainly due to collecting and distributing the bibles at the local chapel, and picking out familiar phrases that he heard the vicar or rector preach to his then large flock.

The hapless group had heard from older farm hands that there was a wondrous Chinese Temple within the Exhibition grounds, forged in the fashion of a Hong Kong pagoda . Furthermore, this pagoda was on the banks of a azure lake that had wonderful Junks and other vessels floating and bobbing about its surface.

To the imagination of the man servants and farm hands assembled at the entrance to the British Exhibition, the thought of expatriating one of the fabulous boats and transferring the vessel to the seas for the journey to China was overwhelming.
 A plan was soon put together and that evening they climbed over the perimeter fence and manhandled a large rowing boat, that also had additional foot pedals for assisted propulsion, and lifted it gently in to the adjacent wealstone Brook, that would eventually flow in to the the River Brent, and after many miles emerge in to the tidal Thames and then the awaiting sea beyond.

As the night turned to day out entrepid adveturers were passing the teeming London docks and then the Isle Of Dogs, and by night fall were in the North Sea. The only form of navigation was by the stars and an old copy of "Punch" that had a map of the world within its tattered covers.

Amazingly, although never confirmed, it has been reported throughout the the world, in such divers locations as Lisbon Portugal, Cape Town South Africa, Colombo Sri Lanka and Djakarta Sumatra, that a strange small vessel with naked pink fleshed sailors had made port at the various locations , and that after refilling with water and bread, they would slip back in to the dark seas heading on an eastern trajectory shouting that China cant be far by now !

Further more, tradition on Causeway Bay, Honk Kong, is that a small band of western sailors disembarked after a journey taking some 20 years and proceeded to make a living by waiting on the wealthy mandarins that held back their wealth from the colonial British and felt safe displaying their wealthy amongst the peasant like sunburnt "ghost eyed" "western devils" that had crawled ashore whispering China, China China are we there yet.

These stories have never been proven, but if you go to Hong Kong today , and loiter around the Causeway Bay area, you will often catch a glimpse of a "round eyed" tramps who stare back at your western countenance with a wistful sigh about their mouths, and a quite whistle emitting from their crooked mouths, to the tune of god save the King.....................

"RASTA" HURLEY IN FAILED BAJAN COUP D'ETAT

"RASTA" HURLEY IN FAILED BAJAN COUP D'ETAT

Former military adviser to the Duck Flat Cap Society, Rasta Hurley, has stunned the Caribbean by allegedly attempting a putsch, and overthrow of the Bajan government.


The Coup D'etat had been planned by the ageing lothario, so as to enable the recently betrothed "Hard man" to establish an Empire and court, for the self styled Rasta and wife to be, to rule over with a rod of steel and ganja.

A remarkable change has betaken Rasta Hurley of late, with a marked change in attitude towards  the laid back Caribbean attitude and a rekindled love of Ganja.


It is a well known fact that as well as life saving triple bypass surgery Rasta Hurley also underwent a Penile Extension when he was recently under the surgeons knife. 
This increased vigour has had an unsurprising effect on the ageing ex military hard man, and i was of no surprise to the Imbibing sub committee of the Duck Flat Cap Society, that he has cemented his passion for ebony flesh by recently becoming betrothed to his ex home help and future wife.

However, as an unexplained side effect of this increase in his lust, he has also been bewitched with a longing to take control of his environment and to establish a homeland for himself and his partner.

This has directly led to his recent failed Coup D'etat in the Caribbean. The unsuccessful attempt to rest power from the Bajan authorities was thwarted due to his utter lack of planning and  man power. The putsch was to be initiated by a viral attack on the governments computer services and net works so that communications were stalled, thus allowing Basher Hurley and his small band of  revolutionaries to storm the government building and take control. 

However, the rebellion was timed to start during a wedding feast that he was attending and due to copious amounts of alcohol and ganja, and a fist fight against a six foot six limbo dancer, Rasta Hurley completely missed the proposed assault and retired to the bed of his mistress for a short passionate clinch with his pillow and hours of deep sleep.   

The Duck Flat Cap society have recently been advised by its acting president and chairman, Driver Chard of El Hadj Duif, that he had been approached to accompany Rast Hurley on his military expedition, but that he turned him aside due to his dislike of Rum Punch and the fact that he could not use his London Transport free bus pass on the island.  

Rasta Hurley , has denied all knowledge of the failed Coup D'etat, but has been subpoenaed by the DFCS  to attend a commission that will investigate the sailiant facts and decide whether the former military adviser to the society may retain his membership and rank.

Further details will be published in due course.