THE KNIGHTS OF THE SQUARE BLOG
He loved crushed velvet, and was very partial to cheesecloth as undergarments. The ungainly and highly polished knight dreamed of creamed teas and toasted crumpets, but had know idea of what they were.
His daily routine included rising at dawn to feed his pigeons and guinea pigs, breakfast on boiled beans and spinach an hour later, and complete his ablutions at midday.
He would be fully dressed by twilight, usually wearing a tunic of crushed velvet, a cheesecloth loincloth, cotton hose and finished off with shiny plate metal amour.
He loved amour !
Then he would parade around the courtyards and closes of his castle, posing and preening as he conveyed his self about the complex of palatial buildings and courtyards.
However, the tilt-yard was his favouirite place, and he was often seen gallivanting with local youths, both female and male, along the divided corridor used by the charging steads.
His favouirite pastime whilst inhabiting the tilt-yard was the illegal practice of "bareback cock jousting", with his fanciful entourage of couriers and buddies. He also enjoyed his courtiers playing gay tunes on the banjo, and would often sit mesmerised as a tune was plucked by a tuneful minstrel.
When not on the tilt-yard or enjoying the company of his youthful entourage, Sir Loaf would quietly sit on his horse and compose lewd verse and poetry to impress his court. Although not schooled to a high level, he could understand pigeon English, and had a smattering of Latin, Yiddish and French.
However, his favourite mode of written communication was in his imaginary language that he called "flutter-verse", and in that he was fluent. It was littered with childish words for biological and lavatorial activities and involved a significant amount of hand signals, that rendered it next to useless for written communication. However, Sir Loaf loved it and wallowed in his flutter-verse universe.
He had a huge scar on his face which was the product of a childish spat with his uncle when still a ward of court.
To be continued.......
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