HROTHGAR AND THE LOST VALLEY OF SNOT

 HROTHGAR AND THE LOST VALLEY OF SNOT

The climate was unseasonable cool, with Icey winds blowing directly from the arctic. 

The frost and snow covered landscape glistened in a dazzling white as the weak sun reflected of the frozen surface. Rivers and lakes were equally frigid and the seas were also beginning to ice over. 

It was in to this unhospitable landscape that Hrothgar was to impose his will by subjugating the local inhabitants of the valley of snot and claim the realm as his own. 

 However, a major obstruction to his bid for obtaining sovereignty was the "Bogie", an enormous active volcano that had continually erupted for over a decade. Putrid flows of boiling snot flowed freely down the slopes of the Bogie, blocking numerous passes and orifices throughout the locality, and obstructing freedom of movement across the valleys.  The sinus escarpment and gorge had been unpassable for decades due to the constant eruptions and the pressure to unblock the pathway was immense.  

Hrothgar was unmoved by the elements conspiring against him, and gathered his host about him as he advanced in to enemy territory. His constant companion, "Lem the Sip" was controlling his western flank, and the Eastern perimeter was under the control of the faithful potentate "Bee Chams".

To be continued.....

 

THE MISS ADVENTURES OF HORSINGTON SMYTHE

 THE MISS ADVENTURES OF HORSINGTON SMYTHE

Horsington Smythe sat in the snug enjoying the taste and aroma of his favourite tipple. The log fire crackled in the large open fireplace, with golden fingers of flame shooting up the chimney, drawn ever upwards by the strong gale blowing outside. 

The snow had started a little before breakfast, and now in the mid-afternoon, a couple of feet lay upon the frozen ground. The tethered horses in the courtyard neighed as they snorted billowing hot air through their snouts as they tried to warm themselves. 

The onward journey would be extremely tough, but progress had to be made to ensure that the unravelling constitutional crisis could be curtailed and some kind of normality restored. 

It was now three days since the death of the reigning monarch and the usurpation of the throne by Lord Loafington of Northwood, a blood relative of the recently deceased monarch, but whose ancestor was from the bloodline of a younger sister of the original founder of the ruling dynasty, King Tostig of Neasden.

Rivalry between the various lines of decent that had evolved in to distinctive branches of the Royal family intensified, most importantly between the Uxendons and the Tokyngtons. However less influential individual lines of decent from Tostig were also in existence and were banded under the banners of Preston, Sudbury and Oakington.

Animosity between these groups and the powerful neighbouring Manor of Hearg had also evolved in to minor skirmishes that were adding to the overall anarchy in the country. The Lord of Hearg, Leif Weald of The Stone was of Norse blood and was vengeful to those who crossed him, especially Lord Loafington.  

As Horsington Smythe sat comfortably enjoying his beverage, he was unfortunately unaware of this animosity and totally unprepared for what was about to unfold. Drifting in to a state of semi slumber, due to the heat from the roaring open fire and the consumption of alcohol, Smythe thought of the good times and days of yore. 

To be continued....