PUB BLOKE
Ay up lad!...... You reet ?
I'm plum tuckered after walk t pub. I'm reet mithered coz mee prize pigeon has colic and the ferret has lumbago !
What a fecking game ay lad !
Anyway time for a pint of "sheep dip" best bitter, and a feisty rabbit hot pot and mash.
Ay up ! I don't want to badger ye lass, but can we have telly on t see the footie as united are fooking playing?
What ye mean lass, cant have telly on cos southern softy bastards in snug will bash the place up ? Balderdash, il take em up the snicket and use me daps to smack some sense in to the southern nancie's.
The back ginnel will be claret with southern blood when I finish with em. Ay lad, crimson lad, crimson like there pasty cheeks !
Fooking hell, I've just noticed I'm wearing me best sunday vestments, so I cant go bothering those softy southern namby pamby bastards anyway !
Oh well, back to me pint and hot pot lad,.. and a natter with the grumpy old gets that used to work in pit with me. I bet their brassic as usual, but I don't mind anging with em as they have good banter innit.
Reet.....! time to ave a puff on me pipe lad, and eat me scran. Soo fook off and sling ya hook, and whilst at it lad, self isolate, you mincing scamp !
I'm plum tuckered after walk t pub. I'm reet mithered coz mee prize pigeon has colic and the ferret has lumbago !
What a fecking game ay lad !
Anyway time for a pint of "sheep dip" best bitter, and a feisty rabbit hot pot and mash.
Ay up ! I don't want to badger ye lass, but can we have telly on t see the footie as united are fooking playing?
What ye mean lass, cant have telly on cos southern softy bastards in snug will bash the place up ? Balderdash, il take em up the snicket and use me daps to smack some sense in to the southern nancie's.
The back ginnel will be claret with southern blood when I finish with em. Ay lad, crimson lad, crimson like there pasty cheeks !
Fooking hell, I've just noticed I'm wearing me best sunday vestments, so I cant go bothering those softy southern namby pamby bastards anyway !
Oh well, back to me pint and hot pot lad,.. and a natter with the grumpy old gets that used to work in pit with me. I bet their brassic as usual, but I don't mind anging with em as they have good banter innit.
Reet.....! time to ave a puff on me pipe lad, and eat me scran. Soo fook off and sling ya hook, and whilst at it lad, self isolate, you mincing scamp !
Later .......
Feeking lock down! ..........
Cant sip me pint with lads from boozer lad ! What a bunch of dithering mincing cretins who invented this load of old shyte.
First I cant sit next to the old gits for a sup, then the peelers change the closing time to10pm, next we have to take a pew at yonder tables, and now we can enter for a brew at all.
I bet Winston Churchill and his softy cronies are still sipping in their namby pamby bunker in tinsel town, ay lad !
What a fecking liberty !
